Lately, Mel has developed a new routine. One in which she likes to "sleep" under the covers with me. (By "sleep" I mean that I don't really fall asleep under these circumstances - it involves me staying awake to try not to disturb - i.e. lose an arm or other appendage - the cat).
I'm not really a fan of being tickled by whiskers in places that whiskers shouldn't be.
I'm less of a fan of getting prodded by a cold nose under my warm covers.
And most of the time I feel like there is a shark under the covers with me.
But it is the ultimate form of approval and love that Mel wants my attention and she wants to cuddle!! And how can I possibly say no!? And how often does Mel want to cuddle - never. So I just can't resist when she shows affection.
When I sleep, I cocoon myself with the blankets, so Mel jumps up and nudges all around my face with her cold nose and whiskers trying to find a way under the sheets. Yes, much like a dog.
Finally I give in and lift up the covers so that she can crawl under. Generally she will either curl up next to me spoon style (yes my cat and I spoon when she doesn't have a headache) or she will lay with her paws towards me at the same "level" against me, and proceed to knead. Whatever is there. Ahem.
It's quite awkward.
I admit that I am attention starved to receive such approval and loving gestures from my cat. They don't come that often.
But....I wish that she would find a place to knead that isn't so....off limits? It's certainly the most action I've seen in a while. Yikes.
Sometimes I reach over and scoot her up the bed a little bit but that ends with my face being mercilessly kneaded. She's not a gentle little thing. It feels like she is punching my face. At least there's some padding in other places...?
You know those people that stand waiting for the elevator and keep jabbing their finger into the call button as if it is going to make the elevator get there faster? And as more and more time goes by, they hit the button harder and more violently? That is what Mel feels like during this routine. It's not cool. Thank God she doesn't have claws. That would be the equivalent of brass knuckles.
She uses me as an emotional punching bag and now as a physical punching bag.
I'm just not sure what to do about this.
I try to get her to stop. I put my hand on her paws and move them away, but she just keeps going. I've tried putting a pillow between us and she tries to nudge under the pillow. Rolling over sometimes works in the way of I get stabbed in the back, but generally she will walk over top of me to get to my front side. She's like a dude.
If you've ever seen a female cat knead, you know that they can get really into it. Our cat that we had for years, Pretty (I named her when I was 3, give me a break), used to chew on a blanket, drool all over and purr at the same time. There was no stopping her. She looked rabid. Mel is just about the same way.
There are mixed theories on kneading. Some say it's because the kitten was weaned too late. Some say it's because the kitten was weaned too early. Some say it's a nesting thing.
Whatever it is, I'd love to know what she is thinking.
Is she looking at me as her mother figure? If so, I think we are in the teenage phase when the teenager knows everything but still needs mom and just doesn't really know it.
It creeps me out. I definitely think of Mel on an equal plane.
**Correction: I wouldn't dare assume that Mel is anything other than my intellectual and emotionally developed equal.**
But when she exhibits this behavior I just see her as a vulnerable little cuddlebug who just wants to be loved.
And that right there ladies and gentlemen, is precisely why my cat runs my household.