Sunday, September 19, 2010

Schedule IV: Catnip

The other day my father arrived to visit Mel and I (well mostly me), and in an attempt to warm up to his "grandkitty" brought with him presents from "Gammy and Gampy."  Yes we're a weird family.  If only you knew.

Among the treasures of gold, frankincense, myrrh, fuzzy mice and jingle balls, lay a true treasure:  two dimebags of catnip.  Yes, truly, that is what they were.

The plan somewhat worked, instead of attacking his suitcase per normal, Mel was distracted by her new found street cred, tearing into the plastic with her teeth and consuming it raw.  This lead to running around in vicious circles.  Attacking my couch.  Doing Mel tornadoes up and down the hallway.  Causing general frenzy.  Reminding me of the cartoon in which the train goes:  "AH-OOOO-WA" and lets out a giant puff of steam.

After approximately two minutes, her eyes glazed over and she strettttcccchhhhheeddd out across the floor, head on her paws gazing at my dad like he was her hero.

And speaking of frankincense and myrrh, my father proceeded into a resounding rendition of Brewer and Shipley's 1970s hit "one toke over the line, sweet Jesus, one toke over the line" as she lay prostrate on my living room carpet in a pile of dried herb, delirious.

"One toke over the line sweet Jesus, one toke over the line..."

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